Surprise!
by ChronicallyinFlaming
Summary: Due to some drunken mistakes, Femshep and Liara accidentally decide to start having those blue babies they talked about. However, it turns out for asari that when the partner is of another species, it's the non-asari partner who gets to be pregnant.


**The Prompt: Femshep/Liara Pregnancy surprise!**

_So, heres the deal a!nons, I have been having this idea for ages but not until now did I decide that, why the hell not just share it with you guys and see if any of you want to give it a go 8D_

_so, heres the prompt: in most fics where femshep and Liara is getting their blue babies, Liara is always the one pregnant, but in my head canon, its only if the asari's partner is male, like normal human couples if ya get what I mean, and that when they are both female but the partner is of another speicies, so is it the non asari partner who gets to be pregnant!_

_so, if any of you are interested then write away!_

_extra feels for:_

_- extremely bad mood swings for femshep, and other hormonal crap like cravings, and sudden break down of emotions!_  
_- Liara having a hard times dealing with a preggy femshep~_  
_- a bunch of cameos of the crew_  
_- the fact that femshep would be the pregnant one was never told to her, she always thought Liara was the one who would get knocked up C;_

_and thats all, hope one of you are interested, thanks for your time, love ya all : 3_

**The Fill:**

* * *

Liara had been gone now for half an hour, to find chocolate ice cream and capers, and the others made bets on how long it would take her to return. She'd left nearly as pale as her armor, face an open reflection of all their dismay though of course hers was so much more personal. None could fully relate after all, though all the crew members could empathize with her practically fleeing the Normandy. Coat fluttering behind her, and everyone watching could only hope she remembered the mustard as well.

Garrus had cracked that she might never come back, could he get five credits on that, what were the odds EDI?

Neither heard the ship's replay, as Jane interrupted the computations by attempting to strangle EDI's physical form as she laid out percentages.

"I think I'll kick in a few credits on that one with you Garrus." Williams lit up one of the cigars that Vega had brought and passed around, in celebration of the newest edition to the Shepard-T'soni family. A present that neither of the couple had been able to partake in.

The sound of their voices made their Commander turn, in a horrific flash of freckles and rage. "Are you _smoking_? Are you fucking kidding me? Do you have any idea what that'll do to the baby?!"

* * *

Shepard simply stared at herself in the mirror, the sweaty hair hanging in front of crazed eyes. Whenever she saw her reflection, it was awkwardness and disdain for her hair and wondering if that scar would ever heal and then wishing she still had that scar and wondering always since Liara had begun sharing her bed what the asari saw in her. She saw this girl growing up into a woman a little too famous for her own good, a commander, a leader because she had been in the right place at the right time.

This was no mother.

Her datapad provided the answers that her partner had not. One small paragraph had her slipping out in the middle of the night, to the Citadel, in borrowed clothes to hide her identity. From the looks on the cashier's face, she was far from the first person to show up in this store at three in the morning, seeking a pregnancy test. It was the last sort of thing she would have found herself buying, and then unwrapping for herself in her bathroom she'd crept into.

How could any of this be happening?

Jane gaped back at herself. At some buried memory, as she sorted through the wreckage looking for answers. What she'd said, a tacit agreement apparently, when Liara had gotten drunk with Tali and come up here to wrestle Shepard down. "We need to continue the T'soni line. You still want those blue children, don't you? I am going to get you so pregnant."

The Commander had laughed that off, and taken her lover into their bed, and had enjoyed that evening, no matter how clumsy Liara had been. Never thinking twice about that promise/threat.

Because what she'd said had been absurd. Because Jane had opted instead for an extra P.E. block rather than the xenobiology class. Because she had done little research into asari physiology because as soon as finding that there was a clitoris down there, presumably in the same place as human women, Jane had tossed that datapad aside. Because she was a pervert, but a pervert that was busy doing non-sexual things in addition to the empty frantic masturbation when she was alone in her room.

Now she was peeing into a cup to put a stick in and check if the impossible had actually occurred.

If there was one thing Shepard was good at, besides being oblivious, it was beating odds.

Jane couldn't bring herself to even look at the results. Instead she simply looked at green eyes, lost and pathetic and damned.

"This is not what I signed up for!" She screamed at the reflection.

* * *

She'd found calmness in the first few minutes of looking at that stick. A peaceful contemplation that lasted for five minutes of studying the test strip coldly, wondering if she should take another, if hysterical pregnancy was a thing that a person could be blindsided by as that person most assuredly hadn't wanted to get pregnant, what the hell she was going to do about all of this and missing Mordin all the more for not being here to give xeno-biology/sex advice. Then Shepard threw the stick out along with the cup and taking a long shower. She punched the wall only once while shampoo stung her eyes and belatedly remembered to even use her soap.

Shepard stepped out, dried off, and went to strangle Liara.

There had been lines in her head, varying from accusing to funny, 'You didn't think to pick up some Plan B? Why is there no asari birth control oh is there then why didn't you use any? Hey, you got a coat hanger handy?'

In the end, Shepard settled for rage and shaking that sleeping blue figure that looked so innocent. Rather than the scoundrel that had gotten Jane Shepard knocked up. Something that she never thought would have happened, especially after seeing those movies in health class and knowing even back then that she wouldn't have any worries involving condoms. It had almost been a reward to peruse Formax after that, knowing that she was being spared at least money spent on unnecessary birth control, so why not spring for that human woman/asari one that she'd seen and thought about after all?

So much regret for those years.

Liara's eyes were wide and dark enough to see her reflection in as Jane screamed. "_Why am I pregnant!?"_

"What?"

"Oh, yes, you're so naive and oblivious! Why _the fuck am I pregnant_!?"

That mouth moved, senselessly sputtering and mute until finally the words were shook out. "Because we had sex?"

Shepard let go of Liara and watched, expressionless, as the asari scrambled to sit up.

"Aren't you supposed to be the pregnant one? Was that not the implication?"

"Implication of what? I don't recall informing you that only I could carry children."

"The fucking monogendered thing! I dunno. Fuck!"

"Asari can carry young, but that usually occurs when it involves a male and an asari. Or two asari. Or, sometimes, uh…"

"You screwed up, didn't you?"

Liara cringed, ridiculously adorable for the person that had ruined Jane Shepard's life. She finally looked up, waving her hands, trying to convince her lover she was worthy of atonement. "I'm so sorry. I—I was drunk. I didn't think to hold back from melding with you in that way. We kept mentioning having a family, one day and I'm not _sure_. I was very drunk!"

"How is this even possible? What's going on down there? Does your race have some hidden parts I was not informed about? There was no insert—_wait."_

The archeologist was looking at her hands. Unable to make eye contact with Jane. "In our union, yes."

"That damned meld."

"Are you going to keep it?"

"What is it, even? A girl? A boy?"

"It will be an asari, and most consider our race to be female."

"I'm going to be giving birth to an asari." There was no inflection in her voice whatsoever.

Liara jumped up, this grin splitting her face in two. "Yes. You will be. Our daughter. Isn't it wonderful? Jane? Commander?

"Shepard?"

* * *

She finally decided not to gather everyone around to inform them of what fresh hell she was going through. Bad enough to see their reactions when they found out. For some dumb reason, Shepard thought it might be easier if they were told one by one. And not be Liara, who had so quickly gotten out of her shame to begin rejoicing and would have told everyone over the speakers if she hadn't been dragged away from EDI by her bondmate.

"Everyone will find out soon enough."

"Oh god, how big is this thing going to get? How long does it gestate?"

"Shepard. You're shaking me again."

"Am I going to get huge? How_ long_, Liara?"

"It can depend. On the child…nearly two years."

Liara had to pick Jane up off the ground, and carry her back into the bed.

"EDI. Not a word. To anyone."

The AI agreed, and after a short breakdown full of whimpering and panic and worry about her body, the thing inside her, what her parents would say, Jane arose from Liara's arms and decided to get it over with. Who knew what might happen on the battlefield, after all? She might need one of them to know she'd pregnant to tell a medic. Isn't that what always happened in holovids of pregnant women?

"You got Liara knocked up? Way to go, Lola!"

"…"

"Commander?

"Commander, are you crying?"

That was how Vega, and Cortez, found out about her condition.

Ashley found out after finding her in that bar of this ship, crying then as well. Clutching bottles, as she would her child.

"What's wrong skipper?"

"Two years. Completely sober."

"Huh?"

"Liara knocked me up!"

"What—are you _drunk_?"

"No, and I won't be able to get drunk for two years!"

Tali caught Liara going on about the child, pawing at her bondmate's stomach. The quarian was such a gossip that it was expected of her to tell everyone else, that Shepard just thought that was enough. She'd done a fair enough job letting her crew members, some of them. Let the rest find out over the loudspeaker.

The Commander had enough problems, and needed to save her strength. For the fight ahead, for this child, for telling Hannah and Jeff Shepard of the fact that her asari lover had gotten her pregnant. She wept, sober, and sure that this was the start of the madness, of hormones going crazy. Jane remembered her only brush with pregnancy, as a child and watching her mother swell up with her baby brother. The rages and waddling. How both she and her father would kick each other in the shins, trying to handicap the other as Hannah stomped into the room and demanded to know who hadn't closed the closet door? Six-years-old, not big enough to reach the counters in the kitchen, and learning the definition of terror already.

She left a message that was doubtful to ever been seen by either parent. Then, as an afterthought, sent an e-mail to her brother also informing John that he was an uncle.

If they whined about quick that had been, she could use the pregnancy card to get out of trouble.

Liara, meanwhile, was all cuddly, talking to her stomach, laughing at weird moments, daydreaming about their children. Child_ren_. There would be others after this one, she promised their daughter, as Jane looked down, horrified. 'You won't grow up to be a single-child, you'll have lots of siblings.' Shepard would wake up in the middle of the night to her bondmate talking to her stomach and telling her already what university their kid was going to attend. To say nothing of the holovids she was making, wanting to capture every moment of the child's gestation on film, and saw nothing wrong with sending Glyph to stalk her and force her future daughter to see her mom doing things like eating peanut butter in the early hours of the morning after a mission, shooting husks in the face, joking with the others about whether or not her breasts would get bigger and then witness her mother beating up Vega for that one.

But her partner slept easier, and in the same bed as Jane even.

Shepard would watch her, see the way she was eased by having something in the future. A future.

She wanted this, Liara. A new beginning, a continuation of what could be. When she saw Jane Shepard, she saw possibilities.

It was easy to slip from that bed and steal away with the camera to hide in the same place she'd discovered that she would be a parent.

"So. I guess I'd like to have a moment with you, future kid. Just us. And whoever else might be watching this.

"By the time you see this, I guess you'll have a name and be able to talk and understand this. Because I know you have no clue what's going on as it is, no matter what Liara says.

"I should say something meaningful. Something that will follow you around and make you think. Since I have no clue if I'll even get to see you grow up. I guess kid, that I want you to be happy. That's not a big shocker or anything. But I don't have any words of wisdom. I'm just a lucky grunt. I can't even bring myself to make some inspirational speech. You're my child, not a crew member. Not a soldier.

"Just, be happy kid. Learn to be afraid and to run away from danger.

"And don't let some cute asari talk you into carrying her child, because it really _sucks._ I don't regret having you, but it's going to be a major pain. I just hope we can beat the Reapers in time for your birth. I hope I get to be there for you. Hell, I hope you get to actually see this tape and that we both survive the war.

"You know, it's just hitting me, that we're both in the same body at this point. I'm _carrying_ you. Half of you is me. That's pretty amazing. Wave down at yourself. I'm already starting to show. This is going to be a rough two years.

"-Hey, there, Liara. Just getting down some advice for posterity. Say hi to your Dad, baby."

The pale blue face on that familiar bed, the sleep knocked out of her. "Goddess. I am going to be a father, aren't I? When I pictured having children, it was going to be very different. Not just because I expected to carry them either. I had wanted to be much older. There wouldn't be any war, certainly. Shepard—Jane—do you think this is a good idea? Having a child right now?"

"It's a little late for that Liara."

"You've warmed to the idea of being a mother?"

"Yes." Shepard looked down at the lump, the growing being that she wanted to see. To hold. "I think so. I don't blame Tali for getting you drunk. Or you for getting drunk and knocking me up. Liara?"

"Are you alright?"

"I'm suddenly having a craving for some ice cream. And a steak. Could you get that for me?"

"It's two in the morning and I know the mess doesn't have anything—alright. Alright. I'll go."

"…see your Dad helping us out, already? She's going to make a good parent…

"I have to tell you, there are trade-offs for letting an adorable asari get you pregnant. Now, let's go see if Glyph has anything installed for taking care of children yet. I'm guessing he's probably going to end up babysitting you a few times while we fight the Reapers…"


End file.
